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The cost of speaking good of a convicted sexual offender

By Sandy . . . One of the most damaging attitudes toward those convicted of sexual crimes is that they can never again do anything noble or worthy, that they are forever  criminals. This is the underlying justification for registries and restrictions that block rather than encourage rehabilitative initiatives.

At least equally damaging, however, is the insistence that not only do their crimes make impossible any future worth but also wipe out any good, worth, or value from before the commission of the crime.

I have written on this subject before in the case of a war hero and Purple Heart recipient being treated as though his former heroism was totally negated by a subsequent act of sexual misconduct.

A month ago Kristie Torbick, a guidance counselor at Exeter High School in New Hampshire, received a sexual conviction for a situation involving one of the students she counseled. When some of her peers and colleagues wrote letters on her behalf and spoke favorable of her past at her sentencing hearing, they received harsh criticism, and I wrote about it then.

And now some of those who offered letters or words attesting to Kristie Torbick’s dedication and skill at her job find themselves without one.

The fall-out is difficult to assess and highly unlikely to be over.

The casualties thus far are a school guidance counselor and a school superintendent, both who have “resigned,” and a Plymouth State University professor who has lost her job. Another two professors must attend “additional training on sexual assault” before being allowed to resume their classes. Community members are calling for additional firings of high school teachers who offered support to Ms. Torbick.

New Hampshire’s ACLU has become involved the situation.

People do not commit crimes in isolation to the rest of their lives. Before they cross the line, some lives clearly indicate the path upon which they are headed. Some lives are unremarkable and ordinary. And some have lives of service, dedication, and self-sacrifice.

Just as with the myths that insist those who have sexual convictions can never again be trusted, this determination to remove every vestige of good from the history of persons who have erred sexually is wrong. It reduces the individual to his or her offense and nothing more. It refuses the truth that each and every individual is a complex mechanism comprised of good and bad, noble acts and misdeeds, the glorious and the tarnished.

And in so doing, it denies humanity to our brothers, our sisters, and to ourselves.

 

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Sandy Rozek

Sandy is communications director for NARSOL, editor-in-chief of the Digest, and a writer for the Digest and the NARSOL website. Additionally, she participates in updating and managing the website and assisting with a variety of organizational tasks.

This topic contains 64 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Tim 3 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #44976 Reply
    Sandy Rozek
    Sandy Rozek
    Admin

    By Sandy . . . One of the most damaging attitudes toward those convicted of sexual crimes is that they can never again do anything noble or worthy, th
    [See the full post at: The cost of speaking good of a convicted sexual offender]

  • #44977 Reply

    Donna

    Sandy, This is a wonderfully written article. Many kudos to the people who spoke up for this individual, and may this kind of support continue and multiply. We had a similar situation here in our city when our encumbant mayor spoke up for an individual working in the city. The opponent candidate at the time put a nasty add on tv about the man he defended, thankfully he didn’t win. I don’t know about others but my feeling we’re conveyed to their campaign and boy oh boy did that feel good!

  • #44979 Reply

    Pamela S Cooper

    I have spoken up in defense of my son, who was convicted for having consensual sex with a sexually active girl under 18. I do not mention that he is my son. I tend to use generalities. There are usually 3 types of responses. 1. Look at me like I’m insane. 2. Nod and change the conversation. 3. Tell me I’m defending perverts. But no one is interested in defending or supporting him.

    • #45434 Reply

      Mark Noonan

      You are a Good Mom to him.

  • #44983 Reply

    NH Registrant

    I will never cease to be amazed by people and their moral panics. It’s gone on since we could form words and it will probably never end. It’s just gotten easier for the witch-hunters to organize thanks to the Internet. I truly feel it will be one of the many things that finally does humanity in for good.

  • #44987 Reply

    Sheryl

    I’m thankful that speaking up hasn’t caused me to lose my job — I’m a stay-at-home mom currently, though — but it sadly does affect my credibility both in my personal life as well as my professional life (I’m a social worker, currently caring full-time for my teens with emotional challenges, but expecting to return to the workforce within a couple years). We have had an unfounded case with Children & Youth related to my support of those on the registry, especially since 2 of my children were sexually abused. That was painful and scary.
    I still would far rather face what I deal with than the life-long ostrasizing that my registered friends and acquaintances face, which doesn’t make any of this acceptable.

  • #44989 Reply

    Greg Hammers

    I had a friend speak up on my behalf, telling part of his group of friends that I am not my offense and they do not know me well. All my community volunteerism and activism in environmental and economic fronts was immediately discounted; or worse, stated to be a way to gain access to victims by looking like a ‘good guy’. He lost a chunk of friends and unfortunately got a taste of my last 13 years on the registry.

    I have been accosted on the street or at a club listening to bands whose members I know well. When I approach the police and point out this is a 3rd degree felony (using info from the registry to harass or intimidate) I was totally brushed off. Attempts to have the agency investigated went nowhere…

    • #45272 Reply

      Timothy D. A. Lawvrr

      Greg,

      Take them to small claims court. It can be done!

  • #44995 Reply

    Anthony

    The self appointed experts on sex offenders is that there is no effective treatment or cure for the condemned. Punishment and ridicule is the continuous mantra! I have news for you that they are humans and make mistakes understand.
    This vindictive nature in the public will change for the better in due time.

    • #45435 Reply

      Mark Noonan

      What this is is over reacting. They label men and boys with the worst because they are terrified that they’ll be sued if the make a mistake. So it’s f**** THEM ALL and who cares they were convicted of Rape or sexual assault. They use the one size fits all. I mean A 16 Year Old Boy had sex with a girl who is 15 and the Consent age is 16. He’s charged with Statatory Rape regardless that he was only a year older. So he’s convicted labeled a Sex Offender and has to register as such for ten years. Wait, the Sex Offender Laws were meant to stop and punish PREDATORY SEX OFFENDERS. Not some poor 16 Year Old who has no idea what they did was illegal. He or others like him are not predators. Just a boy who made a mistake.

  • #44996 Reply

    James Coghill

    Some of the behavior by so-called normal people reported here are the result of excessive population. Take a trial for example. In this countries early days when the population was far lower to place criminal charges on someone was as serious as life and death. Not only for the accused but for you too. Suppose the accused is named Fred. Fred is your butcher or your blacksmith or any of the other positions that everyone relied on everyday. You throw them into prison then who is going to make shoes for your horse? Who is going to make your tools or cut your meat? You had no choice but to weight the impact of the sentence to your community. Today juries aren’t allowed to think about that. Today the accused is considered as a non-human non-personality and our huge population creates an environment ripe for doing this. Just take a moment to identify all the things that are wrong with the criminal justice and you will find that every one of them is affected by population levels and the large number of cases that large populations create. The criminal justice system was never designed to support such large populations because it was designed for the time of and before the existence the colonies. If the truth be told it wasn’t very effective in small populations either.

    • #45436 Reply

      Mark Noonan

      Kevin, my younger brother was a registered sex offender. Kevin is Developmentally Disabled. His Cognitive abilities are operating on the level of a 5 Year Old. But Since the Prosecutors did not know what to do they plead him. And that was THE WORST THING that could have happened. I would have intervened on my baby brother’s behalf but I was in the Navy. I did not even know he was in prison until I was discharged in 1993. But by then it was too late. Kevin has never seen his four Nephews my Sons. Zachariah, 14., Dakota, 12., Connor, 9., and Carston, 6.

      • #45604 Reply

        Tim L

        Mark, my reply to your post about Kevin was deleted.

  • #44992 Reply

    Eldon Dillingham

    Great article – Your writings help very much for those of us who are in contact with elected officials.. Thanks much.

    • #45456 Reply

      Kara Noble

      I am so sorry – is it because your boys are under age and he cannot be near them?

  • #44993 Reply

    Cindy

    Sandy, Thank you for your article. I am happy to know that there are people out there that will support the ones on the registry. I am sadden that those people get chastised for sticking up for someone on the registry. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if you don’t follow what everyone else thinks you face the consequences. I will be in the same situation shortly as my daughter will be on the registry. I will defend her until my death. No one knows the problems that registrants and their families have until you are there. And no one knows each registrants story, because each one has their own unique story. People need to stop judging until they actually know the full story. The registry needs to be abolished or at the very least removed from the public.

  • #44994 Reply

    d

    A message to the people who think they are better then a registered sex offender.

    Our countries legal system does not always ensnare the guilty. The Registry in my opinion is unfair even to the guilty, but I know first hand it is unacceptable to the innocent. It is my hope that you get arrested for public urination. I hope you click on a link and accidentally download an image of child pornography. Please God may someone falsely accused you of sexual conduct with a minor or exposing your self. This is my solution to the problem I hope you all get to find yourself in grief and destruction at the hands of this hypocritical and insane vigilante society. May that day be today you #$*$&%)##!

    Best Regards

    D

    • #45039 Reply

      Maestro

      I’m Phil Maestro and I approve this message.
      😃👍🏻

  • #45007 Reply

    rpsa abq

    Well, the charge matters and you have not stated the charge only saying, “received a sexual conviction for a situation involving one of the students she counseled.” For the sake of this response let’s say it was child molestation/abuse – having consensual/non consensual sex with a minor. Ok, so the reality of the situation is if everyone knew every horrible thing we’ve ever done, no one would hire us, marry us or be around us. But with that said, we do have boundaries when it comes to these things and that is decided by society, right or wrong. We’ve decided that we are ok with not knowing every single bad thing a person has done – we’ve all done bad things. But two things we do want to know about that we do consider to be a game-changer are premeditated murder and child molestation/abuse. And we have set up ways in which those two things are made public forever. Picture yourself on a date. A really nice guy with all the outer qualities which are desirable. But during the date you find out, or you find out via the internet that he murdered his former wife. Would you marry him? Of course not. His dating life is over and he will probably never marry again. The same is true of child molestation. We have limits, boundaries and exceptions when it comes to these things. It’s society saying, “we’re just not OK with these two very specific acts.” It’s society’s right and there’s not a whole lot we can do about it.

    • #45230 Reply

      Carol Salacka

      The problem is two fold. 1. Murderers who served their time are not on a public murderer registry.
      2. There are now (in PA) approximately 50 behaviors that get one on the registry that have nothing to do with child abuse. However, once one is on the registry that is the assumption made about everyone. Would you rather know your next door neighbor shot his neighbor six years ago or that ten years ago he had consensual sex with his underage girlfriend or looked at porn in his own home? The registry is cruel and unusual punishment and is meant to destroy lives.

    • #45255 Reply

      d

      If your statement was absolutely true then women who got an abortion would be the most hated on the planet but this is not the case is it? No I believe this also has to do with your gender and age. I think it has more to do with destroying adult men and now boys then it has to do with protecting children.

    • #45595 Reply

      obvious answers

      @rpsa abq NO sad fact is..charge doesnt matter.accusation matters..name on registry so you can be found and taunted matters..charge? naw….you had consensual sex with someone who lied?,you were on your honeymoon and got frisky with your wife on a public beach at 3 am thinking you were alone? ,you clicked on a cia/fbi ran child porn site on accident,trying to access your bank that is one letter different?,you raped someone?,you molested someone?,you both are 17 and had consensual sex but as minors your a guy so must hang?,you told a naughty sex joke someone over heard and didnt like?,,they are all plenty reason to never be allowed to be a human again and to join the crowd as a “sex offender’ for life…. SO now it doesnt matter..all are treated equally wrong.. That is why it was wrong to allow the government to intact the criminal registry in the first place.. As one of the judges later aptly noted: We (the courts) gave you (the state) the authority to skirt the law under the promise you would use discretion,it was for the best interest,and you wouldn’t abuse it..We see now those premises were sorely unfounded as you (the state) can not be trusted.

  • #45008 Reply

    Jeremy from Indiana

    The problem is that so many people think that if they or anyone else “defends” someone on the registry, they are also, in effect, defending their crime as well. While there is no rational connection between the two, that’s the feelings of many people. There are probably people chastising the person defending the registrant that deep down know that they are not connected, but are afraid of the consequences of joining the side of the defender, so they go with the mob mentality.

    • #45018 Reply

      Supporter for abolishing the registry

      I have no problem defending someone on the registry. I am very vocal and even have had a few heated arguments with some people but all and all I have found that there ARE people out there that think this whole registry is a waste of their tax payer dollars.

      The registry and the sex offense is, for the most part, a way for civil attorneys to make money. It is the low hanging fruit and given America’s fear of anything sexual being talked about or mentioned, they can easily create the big bad wolf around any corner. If we abolished civil attorneys, many of these cases would never even make it to court because no money would be had..

      • #46226 Reply

        Ed

        Don’t forget that sex offenses are also low-hanging fruit for ambitious prosecutors. It is extraordinarily easy for them to obtain convictions, particularly with porn cases. Beginning in the ’70s, they relied on drugs to buoy up their productivity figures. Since drugs are not the bogey man they once were, sex offenses make for good fodder.

  • #45009 Reply

    Edward Nightingale

    I keep hearing about the issue of succeeding with the burden of the registry. About the only thing I’m truly successful with is is my compliance. I do have a few friends. I’m not sure what grief they get, but with my recent separation from from my girlfriend is a better example.
    Her familysuggests she find someone else. They state that I’m nice enough, etc., but because of my status they tell her to leave me. Her one daughter is especially adamant. To the point that she moved herself into our apartment essentially forcing me out. I left a lot of stuff behind that they could use, but the daughter’s comment is, “Why did he take everything. 15% of what is still there is hers. All else is mine. Don’t mind so much as I have everything I need despite this.
    The issue of my rambling is that most of her family knew me 40 years ago. I was a good guy then and other than my offending, I still am. All the past has been forgotten. In the case of the daughter…no gratitude, consideration, or acknowledgment of the good in me. Just gives her mom grief over her sticking with me.
    Add on. The recent separation is due to the event of having leave a life of relative happiness due to her purposeful meddling.
    Anyway, back to other issue on the writing. Can’t be successful if all you do isn’t enough, good enough, and in no way is put towards reforming a person. Eventually, the thought is why….why try, why deal with it, and the thought that it’s all for naught.

  • #45010 Reply

    Jerry P.

    Thanks for posting Sandy! How true!

    I spent 4 years in the service and was medically discharged. I spent another 17 years as a nurse. (and after I offended none of that mattered! Everyone treats me different- even the V.A.!!)

    I have recently been removed from the “official” registry, but nothing has changed… I’m still a modern day leper. I am treated the same as if I’m still awaiting my court date.

    Again, Sandy, I appreciate you!

    • #46228 Reply

      Ed

      I too am a veteran, of the 82nd Airborne Division. After my conviction, I was incarcerated with a former Ranger, and Silver Star winner, who was a primary character in “Black Hawk Down.” In that movie, real names were used for all characters, except one. That was at the request of the Department of the Army. I find that disgusting. As we used to say, “one aww s**t erases all atta-boys.” Next time you see that movie, remember, Grimes is not Grimes.

      • #46443 Reply

        Glen

        Thank you for your service Ed. I worked with and became friends with alot of 82nd Airborne. I was stationed at Pope AFB and SJAFB. I was air crew on C130s. Alot of vets are on this registry. Many would rather not recognize any good we may have done in our lives, prefering to focus on our worst mistakes. But I appreciate your service.

  • #45017 Reply

    Supporter for abolishing the registry

    These former employees need to sue the school and anyone involved in persecuting them and harassing them. They are being denied their right to free speech without risk of persecution themselves. They have not committed a criminal act.

    I serious hope they file lawsuits against the schools AND any parent or other individual involved in the pressure campaign to force them to lose their jobs and/or force them to not have a choice to use their constitutionally protected right to free speech.

    Enough of the witch hunt. Time to hold these people reponsible for their acts and words.

  • #45023 Reply

    Saddles

    The cost of speaking out? Sure I hear those liberty bells ringing but were’s the justice. Sure we can go with quisimoto theories, true principals, or true democracy. We can even go with intent which I’ve heard is 9 tenth’s of the law, or we can even go with a mothers desparate attempt to protect her child and seek true understanding. So where does all this confussion or understanding end or should we all say show me the money and I will show you justice.

    Sure protecting children is good. If I were a parent I would do everything to protect my son or daughter and even when they get into adulthood. A little bit of punishment isn’t bad but a lot of this could be over principled or guidelines overstretched a bit to the limit.

    Sure I got disinterested in my criminal justice course’s because punishment and justice are a dangerous mix at times. So where is true justice today?

    This sex offender is so different from any of the other ordeals or criminal justice with your computer type oligarchy today and devilish trick tactics. So should we all say guilty as charged by even looking a woman or for that matter a man or use some basic understanding.

  • #45025 Reply

    Don Gury

    Thanks, Sandy. Well said.

  • #45034 Reply

    Melody Bourgeoos

    Finally! A voice of reason! Thank you and I pray you never give up your efforts to keep the conversation moving toward common sense and sound reason. Thank you!

  • #45036 Reply

    Edward Ruggles

    Lots of people I know, do not know of my sex offence. They smile when we interact, and are happy with the way I treat them. But…one day they won’t be so happy to see me and they will remove themselves from my world….and only after they have judgement of my past..

    • #45256 Reply

      d

      It is good that you are prepared for this reality because you are correct most of them will disappear from your life, and some will fade away slowly. Just know they are not the better person if fact if your past is the reason for their rejection of your present state then they are garbage. One advantage to this is that the people that don’t disappear after they find out about your past, these people are true good friends and the highest quality human beings that you will ever find.

      • #45509 Reply

        Tim

        d,
        What’s your accuracy rate in future telling? Any better than sor?

        • #45698 Reply

          d

          Just speaking from experience as well as observation. Our society is simply bat $h!T crazy when it comes to sex offenders. The truth is not always pretty so why put sprinkles on a steaming pile of $h!T.

        • #45714 Reply

          Timothy Lawvdr

          d,
          Well I agree it looks like a witch hunt, and folks do discard those connected to registrants. All of which comes along with the General Warrant but there is something else afoot here. I’ve come to realize it’s a political effort, a very dark one. The people are being subjected to propaganda, but to what goal or end? The whole regime has not provided real safety, so which groups benefit? It’s getting low down and dirty now. My States Governor election is this term. We have the incumbent Scott Walker v Tony Evers. Evers a Dem is under attack from Republican PACs TV commercial (on WMSN) insinuation that he protected teachers who’ve molested children, ” leaving children unprotected. ” I called the General manager of the station to confront the sleezyness of the ad. The GM told me that she’d no control because of some FCC rule. So even this really bad propaganda gets played over and over and over. HOW LOW DOES IT GO? I’m no Democrat, far from it, but the tact being taken by republicans pacs make me sick. WIN AT ALL COSTS repugnant!

        • #45815 Reply

          d

          Hi Tim,

          I agree it is no different then a witch hunt. Look at the effort and the investment that has been put into this horrible monster. To see the true motivation behind the Sexual hysteria you need only look at the effects people with less rights then ordinary citizens why else would a government be so supportive. Citizens with rights are trouble 😉

        • #45941 Reply

          Tim

          @d,
          If defeating sexual abuse is the actual goal the answers are cultural in nature. Law has always failed an peoples have tried many other approaches. The regime(s) was yet another mousetrap,[ solely aimed at a sub-set of male on male “violence.” ]
          & applied on everyone at once, without meaningful process, including the previously disposed. Similar to the pre-existing conditions insurance firms use to their profit advantage. Same kind of thing: Using pre-existing conditions against individual liberty. Clearly a real problem exists, and so states move to prevent by attached law, that does little to improve conditions because it’s aim is predominantly reacting to what has already occurred. Registrants are forbidden from FB, essentially because parents can not keep their children out of the street!
          FB doesn’t advertise themselves as ‘the street’ but letting your child on the platforms brings with it more danger than the street itself. It’s difficult for most parents to tell their children ‘no’ hence they play in the street.

          It’s the same victimstance culture we saw after hurricane Irene, where some old folks in a Florida died from the heat and no air conditioning. Their children file suit claiming neglect while they’d put their parents their in the first place and continued to knowing a hurricane was coming. Utter madness!

  • #45040 Reply

    obvious answers

    America is a moral mess of pretend righteous. Anything to allow for burnings, and angry protests..Any excuse to ignore the man in the mirror by crucifying the other guy..
    I have three true story’s all of which high lite the ignorance of America and the populations determination to stay in willful ignorance.

    1st.. A dark,stormy night my daughters ran out of their room in terrified panic because a man in dark clothes was stalking them from window to window from bathroom to bedroom as they changed their clothes.This man not only had no shame for his behavior but was very intrusive pressing his face against the window and making sure he missed nothing..
    Who was he? A Michigan police state trooper.911 was called and he was confronted. When chased off the property not only was he not apologetic but threatened me!! He was reported to the police investigations unit and to the state police department and persecuting attorneys office..
    End result? A letter from the government with the raised seal of the state of Michigan and Governor signatory stating it is perfectly acceptable behavior for a police.. It is acceptable for a police to do what anyone else would go to prison and be registered for life as a sex offender for because of course its only the home of a household with a registered sex offender .. we all know them and there family are a lower class of citizen and not protected under the law anyways right?
    2. I am a medically trained rescue person. I carry my medbag with me at all times and have often came across vehicle accidents,fires and other tragedy’s that have required immediate assistance.I am also a registered sex offender foe having concessional sex with a minor i met in a bar over 20 years ago.
    There was a house fire in the dead of winter and a lady was trapped in the house the family was waiting outside and the smoke was to thick and the fire department had yet to arrive. I took a wet blanket went into the house, brought the women out,who had collapsed in the living room from smoke inhalation. After getting her out of the house the fire department had just arrived. they took over the cpr and she was resuscitated.
    That family has kids that go to the same school as my kids. My daughter came home crying a week later because the women I had risked my life to save was heard joking in the school with the other parents that if she knew it was a registered sex offender that saved her life she would have rather died to see me die with her..
    3. my wife who is an international attorney and currently a foreign judge.She has served 8 years as a prosecuting attorney,10 as a defense attorney and currently is in the judiciary.She has traveled between county’s with no issues her whole life.she has had her passports and visas long before marrying me, and has never had any issues. She has gave many speeches in America for women’s rights and justice.She had her passport destroyed and her visa by the United States government, she was harassed and groped at the airport by tsa and ice, placed in handcuff’s, publicly escorted (after giving her many bruises and stealing her possessions) to an airplane, forced to sign documents under duress with many threats and intimidation then deported. my son is an American child and he is stranded on foreign soil right now because the American government protects everything except its own children.

    The list goes on folks.. these are all true verified and not even the worst of storys.. it has nothing to do with being a “registered sex offender” That is just the new fad excuse for legal abuse.. they treated commies, blacks, irish, japs, Chinese, Italian,bible readers and witches the same way.. its just horrible people behaving in a horrible manner.,
    .

    • #45063 Reply

      Maestro

      This is the type of story that needs to be nationally published, with emphasis on how our “innocent minors who can do no wrong” manage to find their way into an ADULT establishment – a bar!
      Does anyone remember Traci Lords? The 15 yr old porn star who produced a FAKE ID to the porn company she went to work for. Yeah. She’s living the high life even today. But what about the men who were duped by HER choice to pretend to be a grown up?

      Although I’d like to see the registry done away with, I’d also like to hear what the legislators, prosecutors and judges have to say when asked how an issue of consensual sex with a lying “minor” is the same as the issue that happened to Megan Kanka. How is the public being “saved” from the big bad wolf in this regard?

      That’s what needs to be nationally published in a magazine article with a DECENT publication that’s not afriad to discuss ALL sides of an issue.

      • #45073 Reply
        Sandy Rozek
        Sandy Rozek
        Admin

        This specific story has been sent to newspapers. We are not holding our breaths pending publication. Many things posted here have been sent to national or state media. The occasions when they are printed elsewhere are few and far between.

        There are significant media outlets who are publishing the truth, and have been for several years. I just read a powerful story earlier today, one a couple of years old following a person who was on the registry in Wisconsin. It is happening. It just needs to happen more often and in more places.

        • #45148 Reply

          obvious answers

          Maestro If you are talking about the story I posted Sandy knows me well,and is an awesome lady, and she is speaking correctly. It has been posted.
          Also Mr Steven Youder after investigating them and interviewing me did some wonderful articles on some of the struggles I have mentioned here.
          Saddles, I agree with much you post but as you have said at some junctions my thoughts are not your thoughts as well. We all have different crosses to bear, we all wear different scars and stripes and we all have walked through different fires that have tempered us to whom we are..
          In the end I dont think it is so much an importance that we all agree on everything, or even maybe that we agree on anything. Really the only true successful thing anything does if give those of us who will never again be members of society at least the small solace that we are not completely isolated and alone..some where someone else is suffering to and is a brother and sister in the pain.
          Will anything ever change for the better? If we review history the only hope of change that is positive is if the society that currently plys for the castration,death,torture,subjugation,dehumanization,and burning of anyone who wears the scarlet S decides it has someone it hates and wants to torment more.. While many contenders (muslims,terrorists,illegals,catholic priests,drug dealers,and congress)have offered to become more despised, and thus wear the crown of thorns, the news media has been doggedly determined that the scarlet S alone should hold the position in society’s twisted desire for now and have been propagating it will thus remain.
          Sorry I cant be more positive?

  • #45077 Reply

    Kelly

    I was a teacher accused and was convicted with no evidence- while that was upsetting enough- I have moved on because I have too- I had 53 letters supporting me as a teacher and a mother- the judge said he was not reading them. My family was devastated. But what was crazy is that I was praised for things I did and after it was all wrong. Even in prison and after because I am a SO I can’t volunteer, couldn’t be involved reintegration programs- I want to help others and now I can’t. It’s very difficult.

    • #45189 Reply

      Tim Lawver

      @Kelly,

      Some paramount questions naturally flow from plights like yours and mine.

      WHO THE HELL BENEFITS FROM FORGING FELONS FROM THOSE NOT?
      WHO CAN LOGICALLY REASON A NATION CAN SURVIVE IT?

      AN ELITE WITH A DATABASE!

      All my love to you and my nation.

      • #46444 Reply

        Glen

        Agreed Tim…there’s a reason the “Land of the Free” now imprisons, and felonizes more of its citizens than any other nation on the planet. And, while money plays a big part, it’s also about control and maintain power. We are the low hanging fruit, but what most fail to recognize is that most are susceptible. The PTB have simply found ways to circumvent what the founders put in place and envisioned. The remaining “innocent sheep” still loyally follow the government shepherd, seemingly unaware the herd is being led to market.

  • #45081 Reply

    WearethePeople

    Thanks Sandy,
    This hits me in the heart! This has to do with mandatory reporting, and all the things that go along with it that all professionals are faced with today. It is good to know that there is people that are willing to stand up for one another. We are all being controlled by a system that I hope more people will start to stand up and say, NO this is not right. Stories like this one needs to be passed on, just like the one about the mother who got in trouble for her son being over at the neighbors house. The list of people who are labeled as Sex Offenders are increasing at a fast rate. This is only taking away productive people putting them in prisons for long periods of time, and when the come out, making it so that they can barely survive. Not a very good strategy on the Governments part especially now, when we need people out working.

  • #45085 Reply

    Saddles

    There is a time for every matter and every work. So who wants Justice when some don’t even know what justice is? I agree with Sandy and fellow members of NARSOL. There is a time to speak out and a time for silence.

    Obvious answers – you may have given a good answer to the pretend righteous. Should we go with a Trump cliche, I’ve got my bible and he’s waving it to the american people. Righteousness is Justice and they are one in the same. I know you said pretend righteous and I would have to agree to that.
    Now my thoughts are not your thoughts. While I could go on with that I’m sure it would be boring to many that want to justify some of these encounters we go thru. Sure is it better to just forget about this and stay silent or press on for true meaning for all or in that matter, justice for all in the right way.

    Sandy this is a unique article for a good stance purposes. I was noticing the comments on here and that obvious guys answer stuck out plus some of the mothers cries for justice. I even wonder about all this oppression today that government seems to make with a lot of races and bia’s endeavors.

  • #45102 Reply

    SW

    Being forced to resign or take “classes” before returning? They all have the right to free speech, yet those who spoke on her behalf were punished. That should be lawsuit material.

  • #45115 Reply

    David Kennerly

    Silence is seen as the only acceptable, though suspicious, alternative to shrieking in outrage at the “sex offender.” Those who would publicly defend them invite immediate castigation and, in this case, loss of livelihood. As with ancient witchhunts (although still happening, apparently, in parts of Africa) anyone so brave as to defend the accused was likely to find themselves so-accused and burned, hung by the neck or drowned.

  • #45167 Reply

    Glen

    Great article. I would love to see it in print.

  • #45188 Reply

    Saddles

    Is one talking about choices, intent, or principals when speaking out about being a sex offender. Should we believe everybody or just try and learn somemething about oneself. Isn’t that what NARSOL is doing in helping others learn about themself and also about this sex offender ordeal or should we all go back to sex treatment classes and get A plus’s or pay to the piper.

    You know we all learn lessons, I’ve even learned a lot on here myself but one has to wonder if anybody has learned anything. Yes Brenda Jones was right when (Sandy) the Ma Barker of bank robberies todays, ( just kidding ). While Sandy and Maestro said, Brenda Jones doesn’t want us to talk about religion, I was wondering what she meant. Than Maestro was talking about the Old Testament, and at the same time telling telling it like it is like some vienna boys chior. Even I don’t understand why Robin had to spend several years in lock-up. Notice I didn’t say prison.

    Sure we can all get to the state of Post Tramatic Stress Syndrome over this ordeal. On here some people are talking about castration, dehuminization and other negative aspects and listening to these people and the outcrys of others, it’s a bit much. Sheriff’s are saying we dont’ want sex offenders in our county, but nobody has given a good answer to what is a sex offender is, or for that matter what is an offender. Guess we could go to the dictionary but that wouldn’t help in each segment of people’s lives. Sure we all should be aware of abuse. Now if a child actually says abuse than thats abuse plain and simple
    Should one say who is our spell checker today, some governmental “Maxwell Smart”moderator or Moral perfectionist, or one that comes up with the right answer, or the one with the wisdom to know the difference or the one hiding something or should we all just say some serenity prayer and get it over with. Should we say just lock’em up, castrate ithem or should we all have negative attitudes.

    So who wants to be right on here or does anybody have a clue to a lot of this ravishness by government athorities, Could it be the individuals fault? Should we all say I’m glad they have a sex registry or is the registry really the punishment, or should we all say abolish it all together, that the time is at end in this governmental money laundering non effective effort. Government is their for a purpose to and that is to protect. Leave prevention to Smokey the bear and parents, but honestly goes a long ways. I wonder who has wisdom and understanding today in this rush, rush, computer world today.

  • #45211 Reply

    Tony

    No matter the method of categorization, People as a whole don’t understand sexual misconduct unless their in the identity. Therefore, only things we don’t understand, we find offensive. Sex drive is natural, and normal, however, people use it in various methods of gratification. Marrying and having children is “normal”. But, age, circumstance, and perception is the determining factor that makes sex a crime. What is sad is all the people that see sex as wrong must ask themselves.. Where did I come from? The sad truth is we all come from sex. So, when anyone commits sex in any form, is he or she a sex offender? That is the crime we are talking about. Right! Taking advantage of someone in any form is a crime. That is the real crime. Putting anyone on a registry is stupid. No one can show how any registry has saved anyone from being taken advantage of sexually, mentally, morally, or ethically. Registries are nonsense that does absolutely nothing to benefit the people who created it, support it or PAY FOR IT! If it does, Take my challenge: Prove it saved anyone from being taken advantage of or “sexually assaulted”. The person here had a career they worked for, and achieved greatness and success with the society who supported this person. How in the hell does sexual misconduct have anything to do with their career or what they can do for society or themselves morally and ethically in any way. This is another sad story, and it makes me sick to see a nation as brilliant as we really are to hold witch hunts in 2018.

  • #45206 Reply

    Tim Lawver

    @Sandy,
    You may recon yourself merely some old broad who’s just eccentric enough to defend the sexual deviant; Far too humble, you defend humanity itself.

    • #45234 Reply
      Sandy Rozek
      Sandy Rozek
      Admin

      Let’s distinguish between the deviant and the illegal. An act can be one or the other, or it can be both at the same time. Neither I nor NARSOL defend the illegal. That which is deviant but not illegal is not in our scope of concern. What we defend are the concepts of rights and protections stated in our Constitution and of forgiveness and second chances. Illegal acts should be punished under the law. When punishment is complete, constitutional protections, forgiveness, and second chances kick in. Nothing should hinder those.

      • #45278 Reply

        Timothy D. A. Lawvrr

        @,Sandy,
        Clearly you believe SOR is Illegal ex Post applied.
        Would you support punishing them who committed the illegal? Congress, courts, & Admin branch for their usurpation of duty(s)?

        If civil right unduly infringed what punishment would you prescribe?
        Chastisment? Condemnation? Bootless exercises each. Vote them out?
        My ex Senator voted out precisely because he didn’t play ball on OMNI94.
        No punishment no delta.

        What say you?

      • #46446 Reply

        Glen

        Well stated Sandy.

  • #45208 Reply

    Facts should matter

    It doesn’t matter if you KNOW you’re a good person with no deviant pathology. It’s doesn’t if you have one million character witnesses to back it up. Once you’re on the registry… there’s no such thing as damage repair, much less damage control.

    You’re only hope is that reincarnation is real because it’s one and DONE with this life!

  • #45252 Reply

    so

    Really? This article makes me gag. In THIS particular case you have an ‘adult’ who is in a position to support children. This child in this case specifically was vulnerable due to gender dysphoria. That made this child a target for Torbick’s grooming tactics. This child’s family trusted Torbick. There were NINE counts of sexual abuse. But only 4 were charged where she plead guilty.

    I do not care how well you did you job prior to sexually abusing a child. If this were any of your children, I can guarantee you would not be so sympathetic. But right. It was not your child.

    I’d like to ask any of you if you listened to the audio of the sentencing hearing. I did and it was disgusting.

    • #45277 Reply

      Timothy D. A. Lawvrr

      @so
      Gender dysphoria, the feeling one’s parts don’t match one’s psychological identity.
      Is it any wonder given the world our kids are exposed to.
      https://www.cnn.com/videos/us/2018/08/18/ivf-rainbow-baby-surrounded-by-needles-wxp-vpx.hln
      Would you defend this behavior?
      Identity IS how you think others see you. It, ID , begins the moment eye contact between child and parent starts. ITS ALL LEARNED! You claim she suffered I say she learned. Suffering has its own lessons. Would OPRAH be Oprah without her past experiences ALL OF THEM?

      Post the link to the hearing. I may change my mind.

  • #45315 Reply

    Saddles

    Ok Timothy I don’t want to sound off but please give me the liberty to speak and defend Sandy and NARSOL. And no I don’t want to disrespect anyone. I don’t even want to disrespect Maestro or Brenda Jones. So listen and understand. Seems everybody wants to be right well thats mankind for you. Obvious answers is te only one that came close to the best answer and even Maestro came up with a good answer but he didn’t really understand himself or what the bible was really about. I hope we are all still trying to help each other out. Isn’t that what a group or organization is all about.

    Now lets go with that little pharse that I said and actually I didn’t finish the pharse and actally , obvious answers took it as to mean, my thoughts are not your thoughts. neither are my ways your ways, “declears the lord” as the heaven’s are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts, and that my friend was taken from Isiah in the bible.

    Sure it is not about religion as Brenda Jones said, as religon could be any man-made religon you want to make, but it is about the gospel. Now if you still want to talk about sex we can talk about being fruitful and multyplying without eating the fruit. Maybe you folks should be reading your true Creators word. Now this nation is under Grace thru Jesus Christ.

    And I do still believe we do have hypocrites like Maestro, myself and a few others pointed out a few months ago. Now Sandy, Robin, Fred, and the others on the board of NARSOL are doing the best they can while it seems everybody on here wants to go in circles. So I would fear God before anybody else. Speak up for this as courts are taking a lot of this out of christian context. And Timothy I think myself and a lot of us need to apologize to Sandy and Narsol staff. And remember I’m nobody but with God we are somebody. And yes we all show respect when respect is due.

  • #45333 Reply

    Saddles

    Now everything starts with an idea and Timothy you did bring up Oprah. Sure I’ve watched it the show a several times in my past. I don’t know if its still on or anything but she is controversal with her interviews and maybe NARSOL, A Minister, and a Law enforcement could go on one of these type shows and sound the alarm or discuss these issues about some of these topics the sex offender goes thru.

    Awareness of this issue and how it hurts some family members of households and the struggles they go thru in some of these issues. She’s talked about everything from gays’ to women killing their husband and his mistress. I don’t know what Brenda would think about all this but it would be interesting to have a troop to talk about this issue as this issue we all face on here is only gonna get worse in the future. And actually that is a good way to help bring justice back to the lives of so many on here. Even have NARSOL’s lawyer on their to even be on the panel.

    That might be a good idea or have Janice on their. I lieve that view up to NARSOL if that might be a good direction to help in informing those that dont’ about these average people that don’t realize how these things are wrong in several ways. Isn’t building character what it is all about and taking something wrong and making it right helping others

    • #45367 Reply

      Timothy DA Lawver

      Saddles,
      I’ve thought about Dr. Phil, or Springer or another TV show to confront my accuser and her mother. But alas such notions for me are based in revenge; the very purpose IMO of the accusation in the first case. This would make me just like her, a vindictive human. Indeed she, the mom, disavowed vindictiveness as motive in her testimony at 92 trial. My attorney did not peruse the issue; his defense strategy was based on lack of real evidence. I wanted him to put Beth Sh###man on the stand. She knew I was in her company around the time of the crime. She lived in Illinios, some distance from the crime scene in WI. My attorney said the case was very weak and therefore her testimony was unnecessary. I gave serious thought to changing attorney, but he already had my 10 K deposit + retainer. Thinking back now, he asked me for more cash during the same meeting. That should have raised a red flag, but I was naive… I think.

      I still consider your idea sound in the macro, big picture sense. This group would benefit from the exposure. MAKEUP!!!!

  • #45395 Reply

    Joseph Brownrigg

    I want to make only TWO points:
    1) I suspect most of us have broken the law in most states by “petting” before we (or our partner) were of legal age, meaning this is legally grounds for prosecution. So, most people “could” be placed on a Registry after having been found guilty. For most of us, we were never prosecuted. My point is that the mere fact of being on a Registry is VAGUE and the reader is left to reach any conclusion they want. Therefore, the Registry is damaging and should be stopped.
    2) A few years ago at our Neighborhood Watch meeting, a member wanted us to go on record, objecting to the presence in our neighborhood of a person on the Registry. Because I was the chairperson at the time, I said we should NOT take any such action as a Neighborhood Watch. I gave the reasons outlined above. After the meeting the person in question had an extended discussion with a couple other members. That was the last we saw this member. He QUIT the Neighborhood Watch and has refused to talk to me since that day. By speaking up on behalf of a person on the Registry, we lost a member, he attempted to sow discontent in the neighborhood, and has refused to speak to me. So, speaking up DOES have consequences. Would I do it again? Yes.

    • #45716 Reply

      Timothy

      Mr. Brownrigg,
      I agree with you’re interpreting state’s use of a database ambiguous\abstract as it appears online. The photo itself draws the eye and concentration. The data as you observe does not tell you much. As example: (1ct)1st °aggrevated sexual assault of a child under 13″ means he did what exactly in behavioral terms? Given the information provided what ,in your estimation, happened or occured? Coherent from 2nd, 3rd,4th degree?

      A properly informed citizen is forced to presume too much. It also causes a general distrust among neighbors and neighborhoods. Most child molestation occurs in the home. SOR is predominantly men yet women have marginally more exposure with children on whole. It’s cultural in nature at its base. Kinda like not calling circumcision, GENITAL mutilation.

      How many lawyers while defending a sexual aggressor at trial asked the solicitors’ obligatory pediatrician. “Dr. how many genital mutilations have you performed in your career?”
      Perspective is everything!

  • #45636 Reply

    Saddles

    The cost of speaking good or speaking out of convicted sex offender. I’m still wondering who is the offender when lets say one has no victim or who is the offender with a filthy mouth or someone might abused this or that person. I wonder if government still offends with words and deeds. Believe it or not we all offend in many different ways. It doesn’t have to be sex which seems to be the common norm on here. I’m glad for these women on here that stand up for their son’s or daughters and these men that stand up for justice in all this.
    Now Sandy does a good job at keeping communications going about these dilemma’s that all of us are going thru. I don’t even understand some of this myself and one has to wonder who’s breaking the golden rule today. Sure we can all get mad at someone. Some may agree with us or not but we all have feelings of guilt at times , even guilt’s that were laid upon us unjustly. While it seems people don’t want to forgive, let alone will hardly speak for the one on the registry, that is why its so much more important to speak out for Justice and not some watered down justice. Even school systems about kids with these offenses are a bit bias.

    I still think someone once said the truth will set you free. Sure NARSOL and the team are plugging in their for true justice but we all have hurdles and obstacles in the way at times. So a lot of us on here should not give up the ship.

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