Trust that I do understand. I’ve experienced similar situations during my 16 years on this registry.
Here’s an example. I began dating a girl who had childeren from a prior marriage. Immediately, I explained to her my past and I told her I would really like to talk with the father about it so that he’s aware. I met with him, gave him copies of my case file and things went well. I thought the best thing I could do was be honest and be the one to first address it. And, while my charge never at any time alleged any physical contact or abuse I was still on the registry. And, I felt the father had a right to know and hear it from me. The conversation went really well, and he and I even spent time together… becoming friends….
That is…up until my girlfriend and he had a dispute regarding visitation issues. Then my past suddenly became an issue for him that raised in court. Meanwhile, for two years he never raised a concern. At custody court, however, the judge placed me on the stand and I explained the situation and submitted my case file. Fortunately, the judge reviewed it and stated that “I do not find him a threat”. So, it didn’t work out as he had expected…and I was grateful to have a judge that used reason and logic.
Point is, I’ve been through the whole “let’s be buddies as long as it’s convenient for me” types… Best of luck with this issue Robin.