I’m kind of in the same position as you and I feel pretty much the same way. I, too was sexually abused by a neighbor. It happened when I was 5 and it was a teenager girl who did it.
I live with an elderly parent in our family home that we’ve lived in for 30+ years. I’m also on SS due to PTSD and a stroke I had in 2006. I, too, was convicted of possession of images. The whole thing was a set-up. My ex-wife was involved with it so she could get custody of our youngest daughter. So, she worked on her along with ‘social services’ and had her accuse me of touching her. I was cleared of that by an investigation the first time she made the accusation. The 2nd time, my daughter was in touch with my ex-wife a lot more than usual and suddenly images were on my computer – which she had access to. My ex-wife wanted to make sure I got in trouble for SOMETHING so she could get custody. My daughter reported me to the police and, sure enough, my house was invaded by a gang of police who got me to go out into the street, surrounded me, and beat the tar out of me (a disabled person) – all in front of my daughter and the social worker who took her away. My ex didn’t end up getting custody because she was charged with neglect in the past (which is why I had custody in the first place). So, she lost – but ended up ruining my life anyway for revenge.
My daughter was worked on by CPS some more and she was brainwashed into thinking I did something to her. She accused me again and a grand jury said I was completely innocent of it because of the former investigation which found that I was innocent of it before – which CPS tried to bury. Luckily, I had a competent public defender who pointed that out! But, he couldn’t save me from the possession charge and I spent 3 years in prison looking over my shoulder constantly while getting assaulted on a regular basis while the guards looked the other way.
I got out years ago and was on parole for a few years – which felt like prison on the outside. I had to go through mandatory ‘treatment’ which I had to pay for out of pocket because it was so crooked that they don’t accept medical insurance. They didn’t want a paper trail. You can imagine why.
Once Parole was over, I still was on the registry and will be for the rest of my life. I have to go register twice a year and I have to pay for the privilege. Also, the state takes part of my disability to pay for my constitutionally-guaranteed, free-of-charge, public defender. They will be taking money from me for the next 20 years to pay for the free lawyer. Do I have a say in that? Nope. They deny ALL requests to claim hardship unless you’re homeless. Second chance? Nope. We get no second chances. We’re marked for life with our information and picture, along with a map to our homes, for all the world to see. Anyone can get to us at any time for the rest of our lives.
So, living with an elderly parent means my parent isn’t going to be around for the long haul. So, when my parent passes, I can’t support the house on my measly $700 a month in social security. So, I’ll be done. I’ll lose the house and have to move. But, move WHERE? It’s nearly impossible to find housing when you’re on the registry. And being disabled, how would I move? I can’t do the heavy lifting. I can’t afford to pay anyone to help me. What would I do? So, when my parent passes, my life will effectively be over as well – all because I’m on this registry and marked for life while trying desperately to live off of the pithy SS money.
So, I feel EXACTLY like you do. It’s hell and I honestly don’t know what to do about it either.