This is sadly familiar with my own situation. I too contemplated suicide countless times after being arrested for the possession of three videos of child pornography. Now my life is a prison without walls as J Strider mentions above. Each of my thoughts throughout the day are filtered through shame and the decision to kill myself or to search for some sort of life where I can feel whole again. But for all practical purposes,my life is over. Prior to my arrest,I had been a successful engineer and law-abiding citizen with no contact with the law throughout my forty five years.I had had nothing so much as a speeding ticket throughout my life but made a horrible mistake after isolating myself and allowing depression to take over my thinking.
Now I live in shame and in constant fear of being approached by neighbors and strangers ( which has happened in the past) and constantly feel the walls closing in in an effort to escape the shame.
I have successfully completed my sentence,probation and therapy but still continue to live under the label of “sexual predator”.
I live in hope that one day there may be a system put in place in my state to appear in front of a judicial review board that would evaluate my case,life history and character to possibly remove me from the lifelong registration.