If you’re a registered sexual offender, the answer is “No!”
By Sandy . . . The media has been making much recently of the inclusion of Steven van de Velde, a Dutch beach volleyball player, at this year’s summer Olympics in Paris. Van de Velde has a historic conviction for a sexual crime against an underaged girl. He served his punishment, and the stance of the Dutch Olympic Committee is that people deserve to be given the opportunity to move on; they laud his repentance at his past actions and his determination to be rehabilitated. His teammates also have spoken out in defense of him. However, virtually no others, including spectators at his events, feel the same, and he is being housed in a separate facility for his own protection from potential vigilantes.
Now a second person at the Olympics has met the fate of being ostracized due to a historic sexual offense. More than 25 years ago Australian Brett Sutton was convicted of sexual crimes against an underaged girl. He was punished. There is no evidence whatsoever that any reoffense has occurred. Sutton is the coach of Julie Derron, a Swiss athlete who won the silver medal in the triathlon. Sutton was at her event in support of her when she competed, having been given accreditation by the Chinese Olympic Committee.
He was recognized when he gave an interview after her event, and the most that officials will say is that he is “no longer here” and that the matter will be “looked into.”
In this day of 24-hour news cycles, as of this writing, it has been almost a week since this story broke, starting first with Steven van de Velde and kept alive and fueled with the Brett Sutton incident. Who knows how much longer it will stay in the headlines? Google searches produce pages of hits, virtually every story using the term “sex offender” in the header and focusing on the indignation felt at allowing such persons to participate or even just be in attendance at the Olympics.
I keep waiting for the pieces that say, no, they are not “sex offenders.” It has been years since they were. They have jumped through all the hoops; they are evaluated at being at no risk to offend. Can we at least say “has a historic sexual offense”?
I keep waiting for the pieces that ask the pertinent questions, questions such as:
Is there no place for true repentance, for remorse, for turning one’s life around, for redemption? Is there never a time, after years of living productive, crime-free lives, that they can be just people?
What kind of redemption is it that says, “Yeah, okay, you can move on—but you can’t be in this place”?
*What kind of rehabilitation is it that says, “You have to get a job, to work,” but, “Oh, no, you can’t work here; we’re close to a playground,” or, “Some of our customers are minors; this is a child-safe zone”?
That says, “You can’t be homeless, but you can’t live here or here or there—residency restrictions”?
What kind of forgiveness is it that says, “Sure, we believe in being forgiving, but you can’t come to our church; we have a youth group”?
What kind of civic protection of citizens is it that says, “During a storm evacuation, we have shelters open,” but “You can’t come in here; this is a school”?
What kind of fostering of civic responsibility is it that says, “You can vote, but not really because your polling place is a school” and, “Run for office–you? No way!”?
What kind of fostering of family and parental responsibility is it that says, “Family connections are important for rehabilitation, but you can’t pick up your child from school or go to his basketball game or take your family for a day at the state park or even a day at the beach—beaches are designated as parks here, you know”?
And then, after years of being told “No,” what kind of support for his over-burdened family is shown with, “Sorry, he can’t be put in our nursing home; you’ll have to make other arrangements”?*
What kind of appreciation for service to his country is shown with, “Sorry, he can’t be buried in a national cemetery; you’ll have to make other arrangements”?
And finally—what kind of people have we become? What kind of nation are we?
*While these restrictions are not applicable in all states, every one is applicable in one or more states. The majority are due to the dictates of some level of government, but one or two are dictated by the private industry. All are inflicted on only persons who are or have ever been on a sex offender registry.
Denial of the right to burial in national cemeteries is applicable to a small sub-set of registrants in all states and dictated by federal law.
If course not. People are assholes. I am still considered a sex offender for a crime i committed in 2010 when I was a senior in high school. I don’t tell people until they get to know the real me or they judge me based on that almost 15 year old offense.
Glen
When my offense happened 33 years ago, there was no registry. Nor was there one when I was arrested, nor when I was sentenced, and not until I was released from prison. The week that I got released, the registry in Florida was applied and I was one of the first of a handful to be applied to it.
I have been on it now since 1997 (Crime from 1991) and never had an incident before or since. But the state says we have to be listed for life, and even worse, they deny the registry is punishment. Funny because my house has been set on fire, my windows shot out, have been followed when I leave the house, had my mail stolen, had graffiti on car, a fake deputy call me and say I didn’t register and about 100 more incidents.
Keep your head up, watch your back and take care of you and your family the best that you can. I am a praying man and I take every opportunity to ask God for protection and peace. Sometimes that peace is shattered but I always know that I have a higher power in my corner of the boxing ring.
The real problem is that many people on the registry have never hurt anyone. I am on it, for life for ‘attempting to view a nudist video’. I never viewed it, it has no sex, it had no abuse, but it was a nudist video with people of all ages. I was never arrested, hand cuffed, removed from my home, or even given 1 day in jail. I want to repeat that. I’ve NEVER done a single day in jail.
Yet, I’m ostracized for life. I can’t get a decent job, I’m chased from everything like I’m Frankenstein’s monster. Not allowed to watch my kids participate in events at school, not allowed to watch my grand kids participate in events at school. I’ve been on the registry since 1998. Never committed another crime of any type, not even traffic.
Yet, the harassment and banishment has never stopped.
The really bad people, the ones that keep us up at night, are generally in prison for life.
I am in this same sad process. 15 years since my incident. Have done everything ever asked if me and then some. My registration expired in the State in which I live, however I have to fear where I relocate, and have turned away many excellent job opportunities for fear of having to re register due to another more restrictive laws in other States. I do not understand how this passes muster. I served out my time and my registration expired in the state where my crime occurred, but yet other can simply force me to re register or face a felony. It’s such an awful feeling.
Jim, this all makes me sick and mad at the same time. My son’s conviction and time served was 25 yrs ago. His father was able to be there for him financially and my son really didn’t know the severity of his situation until his father passed away. He can’t find a decent job to pay his bills and is in jeopardy of losing his house that he inherited from his father 2 yrs ago.
If you don’t mind me asking, which state do you live in? We are in Texas but I don’t know who to write to regarding this continued harassment for non-repeat SO felons. There should be a expiration time for non-repeat offenders to be removed from the
registry. I will reach out to Sandy and seek advice on who to write to.
I wish you all the luck in the world for changes before it is time to meet our maker.
Kay, this is Sandy. If you are not already connected with Texas Voices and Mary Sue Molnar, you need to be. Go to our affiliates page, under the “About” dropdown menu item at the top of the home psge, and you will see the contact info you need for Texas Voices. Good luck.
Well written Sandy!
The truth is we will never be forgiven or even allowed to ‘move on’ as long as our crimes are public.
Our only hope is to remove the Registry from public access, just as criminal records beyond a date certain. I don’t mind if authorities have me in the registry forever as long as my landlord, employer, social media manager, girl I’d like to date, can’t google my name to find the first result is a dozen stories about some porn I downloaded 15 years ago.
People are hyper vigilant when they know, they too, could have ended up on the registry.
Sandy I just wanted to say how wonderful you are. When you write these articles, there is never any judgement. Even though all of us who have offended in the past, did a bad thing, being punished for life and never given another chance to make things right is hypocritical for those who point fingers. The finger pointing and outcries are especially harsh when the judgements mostly come from people who do not know us or have zero connections to our case nor our victims.
I always smile when I see a new article from you as you shed positivity and light into the darkness. Keep being you and sharing hope with those of us who are considered a stain on society.
CherokeeJack….
Yes, This Lady forwards great commentary….And makes everyone think…actually….What a Concept!
One day we may all meet together and share a cup of cheer amongst one another
Until then, Keep Fighting my friend! Sandy Too!
A Cup of Cheer is worth a Thousand words!
(Cherokee. I am still alive…used to jive with you another platform….)
This hits home on so many levels. I hope in my lifetime I can see my son live his life as a person with out that dreaded title of SO. He did his time.
It’s a money maker and that’s what drives this.
Yes Mom, and it’s tech money doing it. There has been a huge push into tech and database driven surveillance initiatives.
There is real time surveillance via multi spectrum cameras and there is the database(s) on which the gathered intelligence is stored for other purposes. The people invited big brother in the day to day, and now all the people suffer it. While the people are focused of the sex offender, the electronic surveillance state and firms which get them elected thrive by exploitation of fear for profits. America acts China. More than a half million registered persons are on the databases without formal legal processing to the effect. That is a reality of any electronic stored list, public or private. The &blacklist” has been enabled and the people are using them to full effect. SOR cemented much of it into our culture. Even churches are getting in the game.
And finally—what kind of people have we become?
That is the question, isn’t it. There doesn’t seem to be any forgiveness left. People seem to think that wallowing in the pain and suffering of others will somehow make them happy. Facts don’t matter, just what they feel about it. No information, no data, no anything but somehow feel they need to be the judge and jury, for everything. They have no desire to lift themselves up, just a desire to bring others down. The exceptions are, of course, those who make money off this SCAM from Law Enforcement Agencies to lawyers to politicians. For some reason I always think of that quote from Men in Black, “A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it”. Oh well, time to quit rambling.
For some reason I always think of that quote from Men in Black, “A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it”.
Order one of those prefabricated custom rubber stamps that reads “EX-” Then stamp it in front of each instance of the word “SO”
Sandy, great Article, but we all still need to universally agree as to what Terminology to use.
Words utilizing the Active Tense of the English Language are incorrect.
PFR kinda is correct
what about ‘Compulsory Registration for Certain Citizens’. ????
Every time I sign the yearly Toilet Paper, I cross out the words SO and write on top of Their Toilet, “I am not a SEX OFFENDER”…… then The Lady yells at me “yes you are, Mr. ‘xxxx’…..
my response to her is always, “see you in Civil Court in the 3rd Federal Circuit, someday!”
Do not ever fck with an Ex-Marine
I wag convicted in 1998 of a sex offense in Georgia. When I went to court the registry was for ten years. I served five years, when I was released from prison in 2003 they changed it and made it retroactive for everyone you now have to register for life. I find it hard to get a job and when I do it’s mostly temporary agency jobs and when the companies want to hire me full time they do a background check and won’t hire me. They say that they only go back ten years. But the Sex crimes part still shows. So I don’t get hired. .
Sandy,
You make good rational points about how sex offenders are marked for life. The problem is the irrational argument has been winning for years.
I was convicted in 1991, served my time, went to treatment and got three degrees (I mean the only thing I didn’t do is walk on water). It took me quite a bit of money to finally get myself off the registry. I now live overseas and will only come “home” every few years. I may be relieved of the registry, but that felony is still on my record and probably will be until I leave this earth.
Just remember all these politicians are cowards. The International Megan’s Law was passed by a VOICE VOTE. That means all 100 Senators. I’m not even sure it had any debate. One thing is for sure if I run into one of my Senators in the future (not likely) I will be asking them why they made such a bad decision.
Stay informed and stay angry!
I live in Tennessee. Well the police showed today to my job as well as spoke to my employer who knows I am on the registry, I was fired because someone else made a false statement . I committed my Sex Offense in 2009. Was sentenced to 6 years for incest. I am still paying for it today in 2024. I am not allowed to go near my children to be a father due to a law that we as SO’s cannot be around children alone and if the victim was 12 then we can’t live with our own child. Well point being is that these draconian laws are not doing anything but making it harder for families and people to keep jobs.
We will never be allowed to achieve our rightful place in society, how can one, when you’re constantly under the microscope of society. The don’t come here, can’t go there, don’t even say good morning to folk, for fear they may think your grooming them for something diabolical.
The registry should not be public. The registry should not be in existance whatsoever.
I did my 12 1/2 year prison time, then did 19 years on paper. Jumped through many hoops, and have lived in my home for 16 years, but cops drive by every day, like clock work.
To top it off they ask i pay for this privilage 100 dollars a year. I refuse to pay 1 dime, 1 penny.
Today, i deal with 2 states, and the feds b.s.. but now i also deal with county, and local ordinances.
Money money money
And finally—what kind of people have we become?
I’d say America has become a nation of entitled and selfish people addicted to instant gratification with a low threshold for failure and disappointment. People are overly-reliant on their faith and government which further advances their unrealistic expectations.
What kind of nation are we?
America has become a country that promotes self-interest with lack of self-awareness and introspection. This country is addicted to outrage while having selective empathy depending on the subject matter with no nuance when it comes to context.
I’ve been on the registry in Missouri for 25 years. I was a 20 year old alcoholic and drug addict since I was 13. My mom let us get high and drink. My life was destroyed for having concentual sex with a 17 year old at a party. The laws are getting worse and the harassment has never stopped. The registry is an intentional tool to isolate the offender so they can arrest you for anything and make money off you and nobody will care. I have wached complete lies being told at the hearings on the registry about 75% of offenders reoffend and how the registry saves lifes and it’s insane the states can lie to justify destroying people and their famileys life’s. I have passed 3 poloygraoh test proving I’m not a danger to anyone and was interviewed by the head of sex offender assessment Kay Krocket and she told the court I’m absent of any and all characteristics that lead to offended and should not be supervised as a sex offender. But they did anyway. Missouri brought the teir system and made me a teir 3 offender after 20 years of being on the street without hurting anyone.
The fact the people would build a database like SOR and then ask: Why are these people on the streets? Why aren’t they gainfully employed? Why do they get to live in my neighborhood? is proof are bamboozled the people are. Sorry folks computer databases cannot provided security, tho is does ( they do) benefit in evidence leading to convictions based on what data is on the database. I see Columbia University just recently had a hacker releasing information stored on the university’s computer system. An example of database & security and human thinking.
The sex offender & the people’s database driven infrastructure are inexorably linked. A fatal mistake with respect to the preservation of human liberty. Involuntary servitude redressed is still involuntary labor.